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Thanks Aliza for having such kind of question... :)
Please Check Answer Miss Ghada Eweda in detail. I agree with her...I will go with her ans.. But read full. :)
For others, no doubt that our feelings and emotional reactions are part of our very personal response to either bad news or feeling let down by someone important to us. To explain that - someone else in my position might have brushed it off, felt even worse or couldn't have cared less. So that our reaction will to some degree depend on a specific circumstances of course, including the relationship history. However, the following are typical immediate normal reactions: during the first few minutes you may have felt unable to speak; you may have felt shaky; your breathing might have changed and perhaps you felt dizzy or faint; you might have felt rooted to the ground; equally you might have wanted to run away; you may have been conscious of how much faster and harder your heart was beating; you may still feel sick now; you might find it hard to eat anything; you're likely to find that your abilities to sleep, concentrate, remember and think are all affected; and you may feel anxious about all sorts of things…etc Most of these symptoms are likely to slowly disappear in the following days, possibly replaced by a sense of gloom, sadness and lack of interest in anything. After a couple of weeks you should begin to see some light again. Very slowly the periods that you feel a little better will become more frequent and last longer. After4 -6 weeks you’ll be getting on with things again, and feeling you are beginning to recover. 'Good' days may still be intermingled with really lousy days, but you are on the right track towards dealing with your rejection. Most importantly, on the whole men recover more quickly than women because Men’s memory doesn’t naturally hold onto emotionally laden material.
Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” ~Aristotle
At the end of the day, when I feel completely exhausted, it often has nothing to do with all the things I’ve done.It’s not a consequence of juggling multiple responsibilities and projects. It’s not my body’s way of punishing me for becoming a late-life jogger after a period of laziness. It’s not even about getting too little sleep. When I’m exhausted, you can be sure I’ve bent over backward trying to win everyone’s approval. I’ve obsessed over what people think of me, I’ve assigned speculative and usually inaccurate meanings to feedback I’ve received, and I’ve lost myself in negative thoughts about criticism and its merit.
I work at minimizing this type of behavior, and I’ve had success for the most part, but admittedly, it’s not easy as I feel uncomfortable with defensiveness.
I never desperately afraid of being judged, I took everything, from everyone, as condemnation.
I realize criticism doesn’t always come gently from someone legitimately trying to help. A lot of the feedback we receive is unsolicited and doesn’t come from teachers—or maybe all of it does. Maybe there’s a lesson in every criticism, if only we’re willing to find it.
We can’t control what other people will say to us. But we can control how we internalize it, respond to it, and learn from it, and when we release it and move on. If you’ve been having a hard time dealing with criticism lately, it may help to remember the following:
1. Looking for seeds of truth in criticism encourages humility. It’s not easy to take an honest look at yourself and your weaknesses, but you can only grow if you’re willing to try.
2. Learning from criticism allows you to improve. Almost every critique gives you a tool to more effectively create the tomorrow you visualize.
3. Criticism opens you up to new perspectives and ideas that you may not have considered. Whenever someone challenges you, they help expand your thinking.
4. Your critics give you an opportunity to practice active listening. This means you resist the urge to analyze in your head, planning your rebuttal, and simply consider what the other person is saying.
5. You have the chance to practice forgiveness when you come up against harsh critics. Most of us carry around stress and frustration that we unintentionally misdirect from time to time.
6. It’s helpful to learn how to sit with the discomfort of an initial emotional reaction instead of immediately acting or retaliating. All too often we want to do something with our feelings—generally not a great idea!
7. Criticism gives you the chance to foster problem solving skills, which isn’t always easy when you’re feeling sensitive, self-critical, or annoyed with your critic.
8. Receiving criticism that hits a sensitive spot helps you explore unresolved issues. Maybe you’re sensitive about your intelligence because you’re holding onto something someone said to you years ago, something you need to release.
9. Interpreting someone else’s feedback is an opportunity for rational thinking—sometimes, despite a negative tone, criticism is incredibly useful.
. Criticism encourages you to question your instinctive associations and feelings; praise is good, criticism is bad. If we recondition ourselves to see things in less black and white terms, there’s no stop to how far we can go!
. Criticism presents an opportunity to choose peace over conflict. When criticized. our instinct may be to fight, creating unnecessary drama. The people around us generally want to help us, not judge us.
. Fielding criticism well helps you mitigate the need to be right. Nothing closes an open mind like ego—bad for your personal growth and damaging for relationships.
. Your critics give you an opportunity to challenge any people-pleasing tendencies. Relationships based on a constant need for approval can be draining for everyone involved. It’s liberating to let people think whatever they want—they’re going to do it anyway.
. Criticism gives you the chance to teach people how to treat you. If someone delivers it poorly, you can take this opportunity to tell them, “I think you make some valid points, but I would receive them better if you didn’t raise your voice.”
. Certain pieces of criticism teach you not to sweat the small stuff. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter that your boyfriend thinks you load the dishwasher “wrong.”
. The more time you spend dwelling about what someone said, the less time you have to do something with it.
. If you improve how you operate after receiving criticism, this will save time and energy in the future. When you think about from that perspective—criticism as a time saver—it’s hard not to appreciate it!
. Fostering the ability to let go of your feelings and thoughts about being critiqued can help you let go in other areas of your life. Letting go of worries, regrets, stresses, fears, and even positive feelings helps you root yourself in the present moment. Mindfulness is always the most efficient use of time.
. Criticism reinforces the power of personal space. Taking ten minutes to process your emotions, perhaps by writing in a journal, will ensure you respond well. And responding well the first time prevents one critical comment from dominating your day.
. In some cases, criticism teaches you how to interact with a person, if they’re negative or hostile, for example. Knowing this can save you a lot of time and stress in the future.
. Learning to receive false criticism—feedback that has no constructive value—without losing your confidence is a must if you want to do big things in life. The more attention your work receives, the more criticism you’ll have to field.
. When someone criticizes you, it shines a light on your own insecurities. If you secretly agree that you’re lazy, you should get to the root of that. Why do you believe that, and what can you do about it?
. Learning to move forward after criticism, even if you don’t feel incredibly confident, ensures that no isolated comment will prevent you from seizing your dreams. Think of it as separating the wheat from the chaff; takes what’s useful, leave the rest, and keep going!
. When someone else appraises your harshly, you have an opportunity to monitor your internal self-talk. Research indicates up to percent of our thoughts are negative. Take this opportunity to monitor and change your thought processes so you don’t drain and sabotage yourself!
. Receiving feedback well reminds you it’s okay to have flaws—imperfection is part of being human. If you can admit weakness and work on them without getting down on yourself, you’ll experience far more happiness, peace, enjoyment, and success.
We are all perfectly imperfect, and other people may notice that from time to time. We may even notice in it each other.
Here are tips everybody can follow too:
(1)Know What people Want
Have a clear idea in your mind about what to achieve, whether it be changing another person's undesirable behaviors or persuading him to accept your point of view. Fix this idea of what you want to achieve firmly in your mind. Know exactly what you want, and clarify any vague objectives you may have. Clarity of personal purpose is the first step to putting your influencing abilities to work.
(2)Understand Expectations
Have a clear understanding of what others expect of you and what you actually expect of yourself. People often set unrealistic expectations for themselves by gathering up all of the good qualities they see in others, and trying to have them all within themselves. No one expects you to be perfect.
(3) Be Persistent
Resolve to do everything better and be persistent until you attain the results you've been trying to achieve. Anything worth doing once is worth doing again and again. Don't let rejection or any other negative experience stop you. Learn from mistakes, better yourself, and keep on going.
(4) You Must Give in Order to Receive
The old cliche, "there' no such thing as free lunch," is fact of life. If you want to receive something, learn to pay for it. Some things may have higher prices than others, and some things may have a higher value to you than others. Examine your options carefully and match what you can give with what you want to receive.
(5) Pay Attention To People
People will help you get where you want to go. It will never be easy for you to make it alone. People can teach you and help you become more influential with others. Listen to other people and learn from them.
(6) Expect A Lot
When you expect a lot, you can get a lot. Your expectations of others and yourself will become reality. Whatever you expect to happen will happen. If you push yourself hard, you will start to see results.
(7) Build A Positive Atmosphere
When you create a "win, win, win" situation, you will start to win. When you start to think positively, your life will start to be positive.
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agree with all expert answers above
The proper way to express their rejection of the opinions of others without irony:
- When someone utters an opinion that is not acceptable and plaudits from you avoid expressing it through words that would end the conversation, such as "You're completely wrong" or "Where do you come up with the idea stupid," but began your talk with statements like: "It seems to me like ... "or" I see this .... "" I think ... or believe that .... or the result of my experience .... or disagree with you about it .... "When exposed in this way without your views condemnation of the opinion that the interlocutor will pay to listen to your opinion, rather than repelled the point of view and ideas.
- If you feel that you do not accept the idea of what they want to connect it to the interlocutor without causing the sense of malaise you can say: "What you say seems very good, but not yet the time to implement it," and make sure this message well. This will prevent the problem of "adhering to the views" of the destruction of your conversation and your communication with others.
- In the case of a refusal someone to your point of view or beliefs avoid saying phrases that indicate a reprimand or condescension to this person, but it is better to say: "I think we look at this issue from different perspectives," or a "difference of opinion does not spoil the intimacy.
- To issue a judgment on others until you identify the real personalities
And here to be your consciousness to differentiate between individual behavioral manifestations and the College of the individual and personal that you can identify them while giving others the opportunity to get to know your character in a real and clear without reservation and you'll find that they will deal with you in the same way. If the face you criticism such as "you're a person dispersant always thought" and see that it does not reflects your truth, you have to emphasize that although you sometimes seem to be distracting thought you realistic person
- You have the right to say no without feeling guilty
If declared acceptable to do something while you are in fact you do not want to do or you are unsure of your ability to do you have to say: "Let me think about it carefully," or "I'll tell you when I decide" or "I will be back to call you," and therefore must that your outlook on the world to be based on the opinions of others, otherwise it will be you are in this world and the frightening presence will not help you achieve anything
- Do not shy away from the face of others
The method of evasion techniques to avoid going into the discussions with a view not to confront others, attitudes and problems, it is wrong to express their refusal to the opinions of others and better to face and Thadthm This is done by taking into account the following principles while meeting and talk to them.
If you want to criticize here are what get you started:
A resort to the encouragement and constructive criticism.
You have to praise the positive aspects in the words of interlocutor is not collected between praise and criticism in one sentence, because that will make the listener reluctant to talk and become less cooperative or receptive to your suggestions, so it is best to be praised when you praise, then tells him that he needs to be more of an effort for example, to correct the problem of late work you can say: Do you think you will be able to provide the following research on time?
(B) When you connect your mind and your feelings in a fun way people will be more willing to accept what you say
I agree with the Answer added by: Ghada Eweda Medical sales hospital representative 29 days ago
