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Very good question. It is not an easy thing at all. But managers should train themselves to be good listeners. IF a manager makes sure he listens before reacting then he will give himself the chance to understand and avoid loosing his temper.
Also a manager needs to make sure that he is fair and treats all employees equally. Sometimes if you don't like an employee you lose your temper on him easily but if you train yourself to focus on the case and not the person this makes self-management much easier.
A manager has to conduct brainstorming sessions to collect feedback and ideas from his employees and make them involved in the decision making. By making your employees aware of the big picture and making them involved in the decision making you are helping them understand what they really need to do to get a job done and why you are stressed to make things happen on time. In this case they will help and you won't need to be stressed.
Also an open door policy makes the environment friendly so it becomes easier for employees to talk to their manager and share their concerns and it becomes easier for everyone to understand the other and hence no anger needed.
A manager has to conduct brainstorming sessions to collect feedback and ideas from his employees and make them involved in the decision making. By making your employees aware of the big picture and making them involved in the decision making you are helping them understand what they really need to do to get a job done and why you are stressed to make things happen on time. In this case they will help and you won't need to be stressed.
To stay calm when you are dealing with employees is to focus on solutions, not on problems. The aim is not to try to find perfection in employees, forget any grudge against them and always remember that your mission is to get a united team, giving priority to dialogue, to achieve maximum performance levels.
Very useful question and much appreciated.
By getting into the habit of allowing space for others to speak and for self to listen carefully to evaluate the same; Inhabit good roles, set good examples for others to learn and to minimise the risk of mistakes and tempers going high. Create abundant opportunities for learning and developing and once again to minimise the risk of mistakes and tempers going high.
Which is more effective: talking or barking?
When it comes to controlling emotions it is always easier said than done. But it can be trained and it all starts with creating self-awareness about our emotions. Having such awareness specifically denotes the importance of having a high degree of social & emotional intelligence in the discipline of management others.
We all know the cliché that is not so much a cliché actually but a truism: you can't control something you do not know well & you cannot manage others if you can't even manage yourself.
I try to remind myself that emotions can always choose the rational path of calm words (smart & effective communication) instead of deeds and automatic reactions (impulsive communication). But our emotional reactions are naturally faster than our rational considerations. That's a bio-physiological fact we can't do much about, but can only tame gradually through training.
If you think about it, you can always TALK about your emotions; how angry, disappointed, misunderstood, tensed, worried or impatient you are about a certain employee's attitude or performance, instead of BARKING out these emotions. But the problem of emotions control often arises when:
Controling emotions does not necessarily imply supressing them, but rather channeling them to reach effective & efficient communication. That's why a face-to-face setting is usually preferred in solving conflicts, with as less external factors as possible influencing the calm of communication in a rational manner based on WORDS.
By simply focusing on the issues around. This is something I have learned in New york while doing my3 weeks training and what they do in America is just stay calm, focus, concentrate and diagnose once they go through this (its very common to SWAT analysis) they take their time and brain storm the best possible output with plan A,B and somecases plan C that way its a decision with efforts of every one. This strategy keep politics away and create a team work with friendly enviornmet. Its very simple keep politics away from workplace create a friendly enviornment as like one big or small family will automatically release your stress as a head and once you are relaxed your brain will work with a speed of light. You will be calm and will forget you ever had temper. :-)
Good replies by both Mr. Irphan and Mr. Antonio. As people grow in their careers to become leaders/managers they have to start learning to listen to others and patiently clarify/answers doubts his/her subordintes have. Team member learn the management skills by following their managers, so bosses/managers need to set an example on their behavior.. There is no place for anger or impatience in Management/leadership role.. People need to grow themselves. My advice for people who cannot control their temper/anger is to either take anger management course or change the profession to non-management...
its a great art or ability of Manager to control his/her temper..a good manager always polite and solution driven..a strong person is one who controls his or her self..Employees are the asset of any organization so handling employees politely is very necessary..when ever you faced any problem or difficulties share it with your employees or involved them in decision making.
The manager simply could put himself in the employee's situation. Then he will deal much better.
The employee is not an enemy to the work, he came to find solutions and take a part of achievements. Then the manager get the positive vision to keep intact with his close team.
Very Simple. Think as an employee (as one of your team member), you never will loose your temper on them if you are a good team leader.
As we know that there is a difference of thinking between manager and an employee so manager should be control his temper and listen employees views, and should try to discuss not to debate. because by discussion we aim to resolve an issue.
